by On a societal level, and for a number of reasons, MILF mansion is a deeply disturbing series. Are we all going to watch a series that appears to have tricked a couple in their twenties and their mothers into showing up on an island to date each other? If the world of reality TV has taught me anything, it’s that the answer is definitely “Yes – absolutely, yes.” But are we also are you going to stand by and let this misuse of the term “MILF” stand?
MILF mansion—a reality nightmare from TLC – is a dating retreat in which a bunch of dudes and their moms unknowingly show up with each other. That is, the so-called “MILFs” are here to date guys their sons’ age in front of their sons, and vice versa. But are these women actually MILFs? Or are they cougars – or jaguars or cougars?
As Fletcher Peters of The Daily Beast’s own Obsessed pointed out in her review, “MILF” is a notorious acronym to describe a mom who’s also physically attractive. Cougars, on the other hand, are older females who actively prey on younger males. A MILF may have no interest in the dudes pining after her, and cougardom is a state of mind more than anything else.
If we real want to break it down though MILF mansion made an even bigger mistake by using “cougar” to describe women of all ages who date younger men. This disrespects the Feline Scale – which, as laid out by Urban Dictionary, divides women who pursue younger men into categories grouped by decade. “Cougar” describes women in their 40s; “Jaguars” are in their fifties and “cougars” are in their thirties. Imagine if we had such advanced vocabulary to describe the specific types of men who pursue younger women!
Cougars Seek Love With Their Sons In Ridiculous ‘MILF Manor’
It’s hard to imagine how anyone could confuse these two terms, both of which have such a rich cultural history. No one remembers when John Cho came in – years ahead of his superstardom American pie to explain what makes a MILF? His character, literally called “MILF Guy #2,” lets us know that a MILF, as exemplified by Jennifer Coolidge as Stifler’s mother, is a “MILF – Mom I’d Like to Fuck.”
And who can forget Cougar City—the Courteney Cox comedy whose title turned out to be a big turn off for some potential viewers? In 2011, Cox recounted Harper’s Bazaar that the term “cougar” did not offend her. A year later, she told Anderson Cooper that she still thought the title was a mistake. “We started as Puma City because it was a good way to scare people with the title.” She said the name also referred to her son’s soccer team on the show, but ultimately, she added, it was “a mistake, you know. Sometimes we make mistakes.”
In a Friendsrelated twist of irony, pop culture obsessives may recall that Cox’s friend Jennifer Aniston was once embroiled in the cougar-MILF-cougar discourse as well.
Soon after, Cox began executive producing and starring Puma CityAniston signed on Cougars– a romantic comedy in which two women in their thirties “get into the habit of hitting on younger men” and embark on “a French skiing holiday that challenges their romantic expectations”, Variety reported (according to MTV News) in 2009. Around the same time Weekly entertainment asked, “Isn’t Jennifer Aniston better than this?” (This was also the year Mike Fleiss debuted The Puma-a reality show about twenty-somethings dating a 40-year-old woman that ran on TV Land for one season.)
‘Boring’ bachelor kisses 8 women during premiere, sends one home early
As MTV News noted in its post about Cougars— a project that never seems to have come to fruition — the “cougar” discussion had gone stale by this point. But then, in 2010, came in Demi Moore – who turned the dialectic table by declaring herself a cougar in her 40s, during her marriage to Ashton Kutcher.
“Cougar has become so unsavory,” Moore said Harper’s Bazaar that March (via CBS News). “I really hate that expression.” She said she preferred the term “cougar” because it’s “sweet and more elegant.”
“And then someone said to me, ‘Pumas are only for people in their 30s.'”
Undeterred, Moore told the magazine that she still classifies herself as a “cougar”. And why wouldn’t she? If MILF mansion taught us something, it is that labels are flexible, especially when a different term is better for your brand.
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